Bad bad girl

I´ve been a pretty good girl.
I am taking my medicines, eating well (kind of), calling my mother and I´ve found a job. Yei! surprise surprise, it´s one that doesn´t involve taking out the worms out of anybody´s arm or going to the bathroom in a hole on the ground.
Yei! Please, please not let anything ruin it, i´m becoming so superstitious.
I love being able to let go. I should´ve start doing it years ago! I love not caring for you anymore, it´s a great feeling to go out, maybe watch a film or have a cup of tea or maybe not even speak to each other and feel ok with it. I have always said we are better as friends. we are finally achieving it. I know you have your doubts and you still put that puppy face look, but come on, isn´t it more fun this way? Go to your girlfriend, to your work, to your life of little details, to the voices in your head, to your friends and I´ll keep running on the other direction. Just like it was always meant to be.

On the other hand I´ve managed, as I said on the previous post, to put myself in trouble with YOU again. Gosh, why i like you so much? I am not calling you, I´ve managed to keep that promise to myself. But I would really really love to see you. Besides, with the kid walking in the forest, I feel bored, obviously I don´t miss him, but at least he is fun to be around and keeps me from thinking of you.
Oh and trust me, I do feel a little bit guilty about that issue I haven´t told you about Him who can read minds. I know that if HE finds out he´ll go crazy (interesting choice of words), but i am still tryoing to figure out what will be your reaction, probably best to just find out and tell you. But for that I need to see you and I won´t call you and you are such an intense little thing who is precisely thinking of calling me or not, depending on the ammount of trouble we want to get involved. Yeesh.

But well.